The Blubbering Idiot Meets the Man Who Kicked Spidey's and Batman's Ass

YES..that blubbering idiot would be me..and NO you don't have to get your panties in a bunch.. I only met him in my dreams....

So the movie NEW MOON opened worldwide to packed cinema halls. Now all you haters out there will try to prove me wrong, but let me do what any desperate Rob/Edward loving person would do: Throw some reliable stats at you.

So here it goes.

The second installment of the Twilight Saga closed the weekend with a more than remarkable debut weekend with a $140.7 million opening in the U.S alone and worldwide opening of $118.1 million making the total a whopping $258 million . WowZers. I can't even count half that far.

For all you movie fact illiterates out there, this is what the above information means:

The enormous collection that the sequel raked in makes it the 3rd biggest opening in Hollywood history, falling just behind The Dark Knight and Spiderman. And while you can gloat about the fact that it came third over all, let me just break it down a little bit more so that you can put your mouth where your money is and shut the heck up. Here are some more facts that might make you want to punch me in my gut:

Numero Uno. New Moon has the biggest opening in November ever, even beating our favourite teenage wizard, Harry Potter. The Goblet of Fire got $102.7 million. Edward beat Harry by 38 million. Aww Poor Harry. Don't even try to bring the age thing into the picture.

Number 2: While in the overall weekend gross, Edward couldn't beat Spidey or Blacky, Edward and team got the biggest two day gross ever, beating The Dark Knight. Yes read this and weep punks. New Moon's $115.9 million Friday-Saturday) vs The Dark Knight's $114.8 million start.

Tres: I'll stop my gloating with these last few facts, Biggest opening day ever ($67.2 million); biggest single day ever ($67.2 million); biggest showing ever ($26.3 million).

No offense to Spidey and Batman. I mean I grew up loving Bruce, but I appreciated him for his non super heroish ways, his ability to be human but super human at the same time. I still love Batman, it's just not the same love.

So New Moon couldn't win the weekend crown. Who gives a hoot, but since I brought it up anyways, lets just get this clear. New Moon did not have a world wide release like Spiderman or The Dark Knight. In fact it hasn't even released in INDIA, but thats another blog waiting to be written. Anyways, Edward Cullen, the sexy and smart 108 year old vampire with a body of a seventeen-year-old proved that you don't have to be a comic book super hero to be a box office king. While I don't give the success of the saga solely to Rob Pattinson, he definitely is the biggest contributing factor.

So why am I, an almost 24 year old working independent and strong woman lusting over this frosty white blood sucker? ::Sigh::..Wish I could explain it. While reading the books it was more about the character of Edward Cullen. But with the movie Edward comes to life in Robert Pattinson's body and soul and believe me, I have no complaints. So he looks pasty, so his hair looks to good to be true.

"He lay perfectly still in the grass, his shirt open over his sculpted, incandescent chest, his scintillating arms bare. His glistening, pale lavender lids were shut, though of course he didn’t sleep. A perfect statue, carved in some unknown stone, smooth like marble, glittering like crystal.”

Yes. That's what dreams are made of. I am part of the Edward Cult, and the more you call me a loser, the more I find salvage in Edward and the deeper I dive into this infatuation. It's like I am out to prove a point. I have an obsessive Twilight Disorder. I yearn to be Bella and quite frankly wouldn't think twice if I could be a vampire forever with Edward.

Why should you make fun of Stephanie Meyer, the author of the Twilight books, when we devour classics like "Pride and Prejudice", "Emma", "Tess of the D'ubervilles", etc? I mean despite the dark trappings of the Twilight series, it is nothing but a reincarnation of the classic tale of a vulnerable young woman and a powerful overbearing man who surrenders his pride for his lady love. Romantic? Quite.

Who wouldn't want to be a strong but poor damsel in distress, summoned to the highest ends of romanticism and passionate love by the coolest vampire on the block?

Who wouldn't want to test the ethical and emotional limits of this vampire god, who oozes raw masculinity?

I wish my scent was excruciatingly painful for Edward. The very thought of it gets me all hot and bothered.

So Ella might technically be the protagonist of the Franchise, but who cares. She's so plain Jane. And he is perfection personified, he composes music, drives hot cars and is smart, not to mention he loves this plain jane enough to sacrifice his wants for her safety. ::Sigh.

I can go on and on about how this Saga is the next best ting to happen to our generation since Google, but you haters will only laugh it off. I don't mind though. Maybe you should look deep down into your hearts and think about the fact that I find Edwards (fictional characters) company more appealing then yours.

So it all boils down to being loved by Edward Cullen. I would give my A+ blood to him any time. Edward are you listening?