There's a Britney Spears in all of us...

Yes. My posts title is actually "There's a Britney Spears in All of Us". No I wasn't paid to write this. No I'm not high on Pepsi or Twix bars. No I am not bald, blonde or with child. I'm not any of those things. Laugh all you want and shake your head in utter disagreement. Nothing is going to change the fact that you have more in common with Brit than you'd like to admit.

Don't you remember the time she used to look like this. I was in high school and couldn't believe how much I disliked her (because she was with Justin) and loved her because her songs were so freakin catchy. All at the same time. Let's just say I was never able to get over Britney Spears.

So she used to look like this:

and this:


So what made her this?

We're not here to talk about the phenomenon known as Britney Spears without mentioning a few truths. I must warn you, I haven't grown up in the same era as the Beatles, Janis Joplin or the Doors even. I'm not going to pretend that I don't like or even listen to Britney Spears. Cuz truth be told, I probably own every CD that she has ever released. That's a feat. But this post is not about me being biased towards one of the most revered, wasted (talent wise) and talked about blondes to walk this earth. Forget Marilyn Monroe, there is a new tragic blonde to feel bad for and remember.

Now yes, I must admit, her recent appearance on Glee inspired me to say all this. She's no Michael, she's no John, she's no Gaga, or Madonna. But you better recognize that they aren't her either.

For the duration of this post, I humbly request you to put aside your pop hating antics and look back to the time when Britney Spears was bigger than anything or anyone else. A time when Catholic school girl gone bad was still considered scandalous, when catchy pop beats was all the world wanted to hear and could hear and when ...Oops I did it Again was a state of mind.

Sit back, relax and try to be honest with yourself when reminiscing.

Popularity peaked: Some get it young, some get it old, but everyone goes through a surge of popularity in their lifetime. Personally I was never too popular. In school I was always in the middle of the crowd, not ahead of it. But in college, I had my moments. Moments where I seemed like the coolest kid with her high heels and fancy hair cut. Then I started wearing flats again and my hair grew out. That's not the point. The point is even the "geek" becomes the cool one, even if it is just in the "geek" community. Being popular comes with its highs and lows. The lows include the tension one carries on their shoulders trying to maintain the popularity. Britney was just the most popular girl in the world. That's stressful times 6 billion.

Bald moments: In the bathroom drain, on my pillow, in my food! Hair can be so annoying. Sometimes it's too frizzy, sometimes it's too flat, but its everywhere but on your head. At least once in your lifetime, you will have a bald moment. It's true. And when you do, you might not even be the first one to notice. Now the brilliant thing about Britney is that she chose to go bald. Most of us though have to wait for our hair to fall out. Thankfully her head is pretty sexy.

"I wish my hair was thicker, and I wish my feet were prettier. My toes are really ugly. I wish my ears were smaller. And my nose could be smaller too" - Britney Spears

Mine on the other hand is dented in random spots. Great, now I can't even go bald in peace. Anyways Britney went bald on purpose but the worlds biggest superstar and hottest royal are going bald naturally. No comparisons, just creating awareness.

Walked bare foot: I don't have the most flattering feet on Earth. In fact I have on several occasions walked barefoot outdoors. Since I live in India, and people love to urinate at the nearest wall or bush, it doesn't matter if you wear shoes or not, you might have stepped on something which seeped its way onto the bottom of your foot.


So now coming back to Britney walking barefoot in a public restroom.

Well odds are that the 1 billion people who inhabit this sub continent have probably done so too. Sorry I didn't mean to compare India to a public bathroom but can you blame me otherwise.


Cussed at the paps: When your as famous as Britney Spears, even the gum you chew and spit is as valuable as your biggest selling album. The problem is, we all love hearing so much about the songstress in distress, that we forget she is human and will react like a human. So when hundreds of paps get in her face, she is bound to attack, even if it is with an umbrella. Now I'm not Britney Spears (not like I haven't had dreams about it though), but I hate when people take pictures of me when I'm not in the mood to take pictures. Sure I'm no news maker, but even the most attention whoring starlet has her off days. Britney has had her fair share too. So my photo taking friends who love to catch those "Kodak" or Candid moments, please check my facial expressions first. If it says "F" off. Then do just that.

Gleek wannabe: Whether publicly or secretly (in the privacy of their bathroom) Who doesn't want to be a Gleek? Singing down school corridors, retaliating through pop songs, increasing sex appeal through Madonna numbers, saying sorry with Rihanna, it all happens on Glee. Now normal mortals go as far as wishing and maybe doing a number here or there, but Britney, no she gets a whole episode to herself. Let's face it, Britney is beating you in this competition.



Kissed Justin Timberlake: In my dreams (and yours) Okay I wish. She did it though. I'm totally J. I can't talk about this part because it brings back all those 14 year old girl fantasies. That's a whole other blog post.




Had her fair share of men: We'll never really know who she was with besides Justin, K Fed and that best friend of hers who she married and divorced. Flings like Colin Ferrel, who cares? She's been there done that. She's even had kids. But yes, I quote Britney when I defend her and say "With a kid on my arm, I'm still an exceptional earner". She is. Men come and go, but Britney will always be around. Even if you don't like that thought. Which girl hasn't made rash decisions with men around. Which girl has not had problems with the opposite sex? Well nuns don't count. But lets face it, famous or not famous, boys/men bring out the worst in us (the best too).

"I did not have implants, I just had a growth spurt": I know this all too well. People think you've done something, when all you've done is be yourself. Even if she did have a boob job, it's her prerogative, her wish and her freaking boob-full right. So maybe all of us haven't had a boob job or even been questioned about it, but haven't you ever had it so good that people raised an eyebrow over the authenticity or legitimacy of it?

• If you're getting good grades: "oh you're lucky", "She must have slept with the professor".

• If you have a cute boyfriend: "It's probably just temporary until he finds another sleazebag to move on to."
• Your looking prettier/more handsome: "It's all that makeup", "He got some professional help".
• You got an increment at work: "It's her luck, she's got too much of it".

Blah, blah, blah, you get the point. And with all pretty girls, its always the same story. You couldn't just be born that way, Could you? You soooo could.

No body is asking you to consider Britney Spears a role model. Most artists are not. But we still emulate them. So how can you then turn away a woman/girl who helped me (and god knows how many others) get through school without killing themselves (okay a bit dramatic, I know). But yes whether it was 'Hit Me Baby One More Time" or "Gimme More", I have always found myself singing her songs. It does not make my any less cool, nor does it speak volumes about my character. It just shows that I'm not chicken enough to deny that yes Brit was IT.

Look into your deep dark organ called a heart and ask yourself, when was the last time you didn't sing along to a Britney song or even know the lyrics for more than one verse? The truth might astound you!